Palin, The Church Lady

Oh my gosh, I can hardly bear to listen to Palin give her sermon, er, speech, at the Convention!  That squeaky, contemptuous, self-righteous, bitchy, smart-assy, pretentious, pursed-lipped delivery – wow, is that what her family, Wasilla, and Alaska have been putting up with? – reminds me of nothing less than Dana Carvey’s “Church Lady” from those old Saturday Night Live “Church Chat” bits“We like ourselves, don’t we.  We think we’re just a liiiiittle bit superior.  Who could’ve put that idea into our heads, hm?: SATAN?!”  They’ve got to have him/her back for their season premiere on Sept. 13.

Palin turns out to be one of those “hot” girls you just want nothing to do with.  Y’know, sometimes you got the idea that you wouldn’t mind “having a beer” with The Church Lady after all was said and done … but not this one!  If she shakes that finger at us one more time, it’s gonna fly off!

Look, my only concern is that they’re gonna steal this election like the last few, then McCain croaks or goes PTSD something, and she’ll have her finger on the button, that itchy NRA / Millenialist trigger finger.  Her own Alaska fellow-Republicans don’t consider her ready to govern the 49th most populous state in the Union, with fewer people (and services, is my impression) than many Lower 48 cities and counties, let alone the whole Nation!  Could Obama turn chilly Alaska Blue?!!

And her much-anticipated speech wasn’t even personal, just boilerplate “masculine,” mostly pre-written for her by the campaign?  Not knowing her, I want to hope so, but “conservative” women can get pretty nasty just the same – though not all.

And what’s this about coddling Alaskan secessionists, even having been one?  I would like to be wrong, but I think they’re anti-Native too – ironically, since she’s married to one!

And the McCain campaign is hiding her from news interviews … leaving journalists no choice but to mine her past.  Who’s being “combative” now?  Look, a political convention is offered to the media as a “feeding frenzy”: if you don’t throw them something, they’ll find something!

I don’t mind Obama/Biden having to run against McCain/Palin, because it’s a slam dunk.  Like I say, I’m just concerned about what’s probably gonna happen: either the polls will “mysteriously” “surge” Red in the last week of the campaign, or there’ll be a “mysterious” post-survey Red swing in the election “results” … with massive vote suppression / Jim Crow tactics, “mysterious” e-voting techs messing around the machines, “voter-fraud fraud,” media Red spin, “mysterious” media and survey changes, all the stuff we’ve gotten used to since 2000.  Maybe even another unConstitutional federal court intervention … except this time the bench ruling will be 6-3 instead of 5-4, thanks to Bush’s GOP partisan appointees.  (And remember, it was Bush who went to court, not President Gore, hence “Bush v. Gore,” not “Gore v. Bush.”)

PS: Isn’t it funny how the Republicans are now the Reds, what with them calling us Communist all those years?  I think somebody did that on purpose….